19.3.2009
My dream- suicides, some sensuous poetries, dream for Mithila Institute of Medical sciences
Today morning around 6, I wake up from sleep and I had a dream that I was on a road going to my home near hospital and a kuchha raod was joining it on which a scooty stopped and a Sardarji whom I thought to be drank fell down and nearby his little son, The son saw his father gasping and he closed his nose so that he may die and the boy also died.
I could not comprehend and thought to go near him for fear of police interrogation but then I was also thinking that at hospital I would have to examine and render help so better I should help now and my sleep was broken.
Many doctors and persons do not come forward for this police fear others.
Though I recall one Sardar who committed suicide falling from upper floors at MECON many years back with his full family this Sardar in dream was a different person.
Son of my colleague lady doctor had asked me two days back as to what happens to soul of such suicide committers and I had explained about PRETATMA and Gaya SHRADDHA.
I also said that GK Chesterton had said, “Suicide is the greatest crime because it makes any crime to do impossible,”
Whole day I was under the terror of having as if some serious disease for my eosinophilia and took consultations from my colleagues though did my normal routine.
I also read a few stories in Antika . At night read late Balram’s story on a schoolteacher and could know that simple looking Amarnath Jha of State Library also writes well. His father was a great Maithili writer.
I started reading Pawan’s long story and roamed in Darbhanga’s locality and reading a prinipal’ account for writng daily in diary in am impression since childhood ‘’if he became a great personality,’I realized that though I also writing my diaries in my middle school age by the advice of a teacher Hargovingd Singh Kushwaha in his farewell address.
He was an author of Hindi grammar, Rastrabhasha ke anmol ratna,: and had adviced us that by writing so you may be able to write an essay on any thing.
I started writing in Hindi, switched to English to make my English better and when some person informed me that Gandhi was writing diary in Gujarati I started writing in Maithili though then I was not a Maithili activist and had no impression like that aged Principal whose pen stuck to write on whether he write truth and what will be its bearings on his family life.
It is not that I did not had or will have such occasion in my life.
My bhuji Kusum put advice with a poetry to my reply in a poetry that I cannot write blogs in Maithili(Devnagari )and I replied her poem
भले अहाँ नय करी अभ्यास ,आ नय छोरी रोमनक भास .मुदा हमर गप्प लिय ई मानि.एक बेर में हारि नय मानु ,करैत रहू सतत प्रयास .
March 18, 2009 8:57 AM
Dr. Dhanakar Thakur said...
छोरिके हम छौरी पर्हलान्हू
Romank bhas रोमांस
हरिके हम haar पर्ह्लान्हू
ekahi ber me gelanhu हारी
jakar jehen ansh hoit chhaiktehne
bhog o pabaykayal prayas vyarth
nahi जाए kahlanhi kavi कुसुमारी
nahee likhayayat ee gharnik बोली
Harimohanjik Mem
सही angrejee बोली ,
angrejee likheeechahe galti sअल्ती
hospeed banal rahak
chaheechahe je durghatna हो
speeddating ke jamana में
dhrire dhire kiyak बरही
hanuman kud lagakay भौजी hath
pair toral
kareeapan path rakhu apana लग
hamra san ee nahee chalatLikhab nagari
bahut कठिन
distance learning san
nahee sikhabkaहो yo
jan bhay gelanhu
प्रत्यक्ष paath apan jari rakhab।
Even today I a wrote another poem which will be treated as sensuous and whenever I write poems in English it becomes so that my English collection, “Absolute,” was commented ‘sensous,’ by great writer Padmbhushan Dr. U.R.Ananthmuthy also. Here I add one more in that,
A Pumping station
You are only one
Whom I can write stony
Or rosy as I may like
Have you seen roses
Without thorns
Or horns without stones
Doctors see horn
Even there where
Rosy petal should
Have dew drop
Doctors say stony
When there is something
As cancerous
But these love maker
Say stony
Not to those
Who weigh more stones
Like the poets
Who see stones
Of Stonehenge and write
Beauolfe and many
That may be there
Archives count their numbers
And circles and semi circle
And if I say stony
To her whom I could
Have measures girth
With tapes of hands
Warm and soothing
Before dews dropped
On her rosy petals
She screamed and
Cried, "O, Stony
I am called?"
“Had not you entered
In my heart and found
A fountain of love.”
'No,' ‘ I found that
was not heart
But a pumping station.’
19.3.09
One Maithil Manoj from Dalsingsari, replied from Chennai that he would like to meet me . He has already done Maithili show at Chennai. I gave him my number. There are few persons on mail who respond and like to work.
Another Maithil Ishwar asked ,”Can we do something for Antika's subscription ? Though I know its tones become political and we need an apolitical magazine. But still.” I merely replied,
“Yes, due to its Marxist line many do not appreciate it but subscribing any Maithili magazine is good and a list of Maithili magazines and contact number is given in Maithili Sandesh,(including that of Antika) .Still sometime(please remind me) again I will flash that.
I did not get Rinky’s reply who is young and willing to work for Mithila and wrote her,
.
“ I am very happy that you have an earnest desire to work for development of Mithila.
Once I was in a hostel of a medical college at Mysore(JJS) and a Maithil boy said to me, two girls of first year of MBBS became owner of 118 and 125 crores(as soon as they entered 18th year i.e. became major and inherited their father's empire)-I wished those girls bevame members of my medical organisation (NMO) so that they may start a medical college which can give service to poor and produce doctors with heart and brain.
I know even Mahamana Malviya could make BHU by begging and I am planning for that(after donating whatever I can have after I retire on 30.4.2015 that my PF etc. released that I did not wanted to purchase a flat in 30 lakh while at Bangalore ...but I know that is not going to make an institution I dream).
Now I am 53 years and even if I have eosinophilia, I fear to die any time from its lingering complications, if any..
Even if I die early my money will be donated to Mithila Seva Manch and NMO - even if I would have heir I would have liked them to go with donation.
But this tiny amount will not be sufficient..
We need 25 acres land and then many crores...
I wish some day some one will come up and fulfill my dream.”
But is a day dream like not one I saw this morning.
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